Trip Members: John Sherk (Boss), Hannah Saarimaki (Big Boss), Anton Afanassiev (Mini Boss), Stefanija Rekasius (Miniature Boss), Lucas Braun (HR), Ketan Desai, Erik Reimers, Nolwenn (Nono) Deschamps, Andrew Carriere, Simon Tsianikas and special guest of Seth
Trip Dates: Friday October 18th – Sunday October 20th 2024
Oh, the year was 2024
How I wish I was in Phelix now,
A letter of marque came from the prez
To the scummiest group I’ve ever seen
God damn them all,
I was told we’d build the perfect outhouse
We’d dig one pit, shed no tears
Now I’ve a dislocated finger on a Phelix pier
The last of Phelix’s outhouse pits
Okay so that was my attempt at a spoof cause this was just such a funny trip. My adventure actually started Friday afternoon when I was planning my weekend. Originally, I was supposed to be on the Iron Chef trip which got canceled due to inclement weather, so during 1pm Friday rounds I texted Lucas asking if the Phelix Outhouse trip was still happening and if I could join. He said there was room but that we were leaving that day. So, after work I quickly biked back, got a quick run-down from John, packed my bag, ran to pick up some steel-toes from the clubroom (thanks Fiona Landwehr!), got picked up and we headed to Phelix!
As with any trip north of Pemberton, we of course stopped in the Pemberton McDonald’s for a quick dinner break. We then drove up to the summer parking lot, set up tents, and a tarp between the two cars’ trunks so we could more easily divide the gear in the morning. The next morning, we all woke up and loaded up our packs with power tools, screws, 2x4s and more. Lucas, Hannah, and Erik left at 6:50 content with the idea of having to do two trips. Anton, Ketan, John, and I really wanted to only do one trip so we started packing more strategically. Ketan, Nono and Andrew left at 7:20, I left at 7:50, and John, Anton, and Simon left around 8:20.
- Lucas
- Hannah
- Ketan
- Nono
- Stefanija
After a very rainy walk up, and drying out a bit in the hut, Hannah, Lucas, Erik, and I used the map with marked possible outhouse locations provided to us by Maiya Callister and started to dig. The first hole that we started to dig had a ton of rocks so we decided to try a different spot. That spot, in addition to the third attempt, were filling up with water immediately so we went back to the first hole and resigned ourselves to digging out lots of rocks. By then Ketan, Nono, and Andrew joined the party and we switched off with the shovels, and rock bar. After quite some time we got concerned that we had yet to see Anton, John, and Simon so we decided to InReach them. They didn’t respond so we started to think about someone going down but then we saw them come up…5.5 hours later! This was mostly because John was carrying up the plywood for the outhouse sides.

Soon John will be like Jeff with an amazing pack carrying weight ability and construction skills. PC Erik Reimers
Hannah then worked on making the cribbing, and John, Simon, and Nono were working on dismantling the outhouse. The rest of us were tasked with digging the hole, with Anton and I “in charge” as mini boss and miniature boss. There was quite a lot of digging around huge rocks but it was such a fun group with of course, a bit of goofing around, hence shitfest. As we had been digging for quite some time, we tried to keep it light and funny, so in addition to our creative names, Anton and Lucas started to talk like cavemen. My favourite line was “I Anton, I strong, I smash rock, rock go bye bye”. In addition to some very funny other sayings, we decided to liven it up by using a sledgehammer and just kicking rocks to try and get them loose. This was accompanied by multiple sayings of we need to continue digging because we “have to put food on the table for Timmy and Susie” by Anton, Ketan, and Lucas, and multiple mentions of this being penal-colony 2.0 by Anton. Also multiple jokes were made by how we should make a double decker or side-by-side outhouse.
- Mini boss: “I smash rocks”
- We thought we could kick the rock out of place but it was to no avail
- Our brightest moment of using the sledgehammer
After 8 hours we set up a tarp over the hole and took a dinner break. There we met Seth and explained the outhouse project. As a joke I suggested to him to join us in digging the hole, and he said yes which was very beneficial! Unfortunately when we got back to the hole, there was a bit of water around it but we assumed it was just from the heinous downpour and a bit of snow that we were getting. We then took turns having one person digging in the hole as it was about 3ft deep, playing music, and digging digging holes. There were a couple of larger boulders that we had to pull out with some spare rope with two of us pushing it out and 5 pulling on the rope. Anton also tried to drill a rock with a 1 inch bit to break it but of course it was unsuccessful. After a lot of digging and a hole maybe 4.5ft deep we brought over the cribbing and put it by the hole just past midnight.
The next morning we woke up at 6:30am and had a very productive start (including napping at 7:15am still in the hut). We continued the outhouse disassembly and got the cribbing cut to the right size. Hannah graciously stepped into the pit that got more than a little bit of water overnight by using a sawzall to cut the cribbing around the rocks. Unfortunately, this caused some sections of the cribbing to be a bit less stable, so we screwed on some spare 2x4s to keep the cribbing stable.
It was finally time to move the outhouse! It was mostly disassembled as the outhouse would have been too heavy to move otherwise. We still had to put up the scaffolding to make it easier to tilt the outhouse and it took all 10 of us to move it. We then had to make a base on which the outhouse could stand. To do so Anton sawed the studs (4x6s) to the appropriate length. Then we had to compact the soil around the cribbing so that the base wouldn’t sink in unevenly. We then put the base over the hole, and made adjustments to ensure that the base was level, because no one wants to be trying to poop while they’re falling backwards :0
Since it was after 3pm, we decided that that would be where we would leave it. So we undid the tarp, moved the outhouse past the last boulders, placed it onto the base to help it set and screwed on the tarp so it wouldn’t fly away. The Phelix Wood Haul group the weekend after would need to stand the outhouse up again and reconstruct it. Knowing that, we put the outhouse pieces in order of which ones they’d need to use first.
Then was the time for the great gear divide. Having won the competition for heaviest pack going down after Burton (not including Jeff’s insane pack), I was glad there were many more people and much less gear. This round, I think Ketan won the heaviest pack if you include the rock bar into his pack weight. We then started making our way down the trail and got back to the cars just as the sun was setting.
After the trip, we got featured in Seth’s Instagram account (@seth_in_the_mountains)! Also, the next weekend Hannah and John came back and were successful in finishing the outhouse. So was the third tri-annual Phelix Shitfest successful? In regards to making a good outhouse hole for the next half decade, no, but smashing rocks, yes.
Anton’s Perspective:
Drive big rig to trailhead. Carry many smash tools to dig hole. Bag heavy. John carry heaviest. That why John boss. Arrive at hole. Big Boss say dig. Big Boss protect from bandit so I dig. Smash big rock. Hole dig. Food on table. Boss and Big Boss use magic spin tool. Spin tool make heavy wood from one piece to many pieces. Carry wood to hole. Put wood on hole. Why cover hole? Not understand. Hard to dig more when hole covered. Oh well Big Boss say do. Go to big rig. Carry not so heavy. Move fast. Maybe dig hole at big rig. Actually go home. Drink 24 beers.
Legends
I remember building the original Phelix outhouse in my back yard. The neighbors said they were surprised; they thought we had indoor plumbing. And the attempt to build a composting outhouse; I was in charge of the structure and others were in charge of the composting. No composting occurred, instead we just made giant poop-sickles. And the second time we moved it we found the digging was easy because we were digging in the poop from the original location. What finally led to its downfall was the marmots. It seems that marmots really like flavored plywood. They don’t like aluminum, though, which is why we wrapped the Harrison outhouse with aluminum.
Great trip report! Anton’s perspective is hilarious, I might have to add TLDR’s to trip reports like that (“Why waste time say lot word when few word do trick?”).
Thank you for your hard work! Not only have you provided an eminently functional outhouse, but going to the outhouse at Phelix will now be more meaningful, for when I step inside I will think fondly of you all (and also be glad I’m not a caveman).
I do have a follow-up question.
“Big Boss protect from bandit so I dig.”
Who is the bandit?
Bandit bad
Anton’s take on the trip if totally friggin’ HILARIOUS :}
When I think back to this weekend I just remember being wet and laughing a lot. Thanks for capturing it all in a great way Stefanija! Part 2 coming soon